DON’T!

 

DON’T!

I went to St. Fidelis, a Catholic grade school in Chicago, for 8 years from 1955 to 1962.  The school was run almost exclusively by nuns.  There was only one non-nun teacher.  Her name was Miss Hardman.  That’s right, Miss Hardman.  All of the kids thought her name was funny because all of the nuns were hard on us. 

The sisters were always telling us what to and what not to do.  They were always telling us not to sin, of course, but there were bunches of other things they were telling us not to do.  They told us not to talk unless you were asked to speak, not to comb your hair in class, not to sit near a girl if you were a boy, not to sit near a boy if you were a girl, not to laugh in class, not to take your eyes of the altar when you were in church, not to turn around and look behind you, not to chew gum in class, not to slouch when you were standing in line, not to lower your hands when you were praying, not to put your hands in your pockets when you were sitting in your seat, not to cry when the sisters spanked you, and never ever get into arguments with other kids in the class.

That was all a long long time ago, but sometimes I feel my world is becoming more and more like the world the sisters felt they needed to control.

Two recent occurrences got me thinking about this.

The first was an article I read from the Harvard Medical School.  It said that we shouldn’t shower daily because doing so affects our health, breaks down our immune system!  I’ve been showering daily probably for 40 years!  I was told for years that keeping the body clean improved my health.  Now I’m being told that’s a lie.

The next thing I read shook me up even more.  I read that drinking any amount of alcohol is bad for you.  I’ve been enjoying a couple of glasses of wine almost every night for 30 some years.  I was encouraged to do so by my doctors and just about everybody else.  They told me that doing so would help me live longer by protecting me from cancer, reducing my chance of heart attacks, and improving my mental health.

Now the World Health Organization is saying that “no level of alcohol consumption is safe for our health.” Alcohol is now being classified as a Group 1 carcinogen.  This puts alcohol in the same group of cancer-causing elements as asbestos, radiation, and tobacco.  Alcohol, the WHO says, causes at least seven types of cancer!  Not only does alcohol cause cancer, it also shrinks your brain!

When I read about how showering too much isn’t good for you, I thought I’d cut back on my showering.  No problem.  A shower every other day seemed doable.  However, when I read about how I should stop drinking wine, I was flabbergasted! I love having a couple of glasses of wine every night, but now I’m being told doing so will kill me! 

Reading about that shook me bad, but that wasn’t the end of it!

As I read about not showering and not drinking, I ran into a lot of articles about other things I shouldn’t do.  

What are those other things?

Don’t eat processed food!

Don’t eat late at night!

Don’t spend too much time sitting!

Don’t sleep at the wrong time of the day!

Don’t neglect your relationships with your friends and family members!

Don’t track storms more than four times a day!

Don’t spend too much time watching the news!

Don’t bite your fingernails!

When I came across the article about why I shouldn’t bite my fingernails, I stopped looking for articles about what I shouldn’t do.  I felt that each one was taking me deeper and deeper into the world of the sisters of St. Fidelis back in the 50s and early 60s, and that world was definitely not one I ever wanted to reenter.  

So what am I going to do about all of these people who are telling me what I should be doing?

I’m going to ignore them.

Somehow I’ve made it past my 76th birthday doing all the stuff I like to do.  

Hopefully, I’ll make it through a couple more, even if I bite my fingernails.

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My latest column for the Dziennik Zwiazkowy.

If you want to read more of these columns, I’ve got a book of them available on Amazon!  Check it out.  

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