Subhumans in America

 Subhumans in America

As the son of Polish immigrants—people who survived the hell of Nazi forced labor camps—I grew up with a deep conviction that words carry immense weight. My parents were told by the Germans that they and so many non-Germans were nothing more than mules.  My parents also heard themselves and the other people in the labor camps described as untermensch, a term meaning subhumans. 

This was a key pillar of German racial ideology.  Jews, Roma (Gypsies), and Slavic peoples (such as Poles, Ukrainians, Russians, and Belarusians) as well as persons with disabilities and Black individuals were all seen as being subhuman. This term wasn’t simply an insult.  It was used to strip specific groups of their humanity.  By defining certain groups of people as biologically inferior, the Nazi regime created the moral and legal justification for mass expulsion, enslavement, and extermination.  

My parents and other Poles not only experienced this hatred in Germany.  They experienced something like it when they came to America as Displaced Persons after World War II.  As a child growing up in Chicago in the 1950s, I remember walking around the Wicker Park area with my father hoping to find an apartment to rent and seeing signs on buildings saying that the owners would not rent to Poles.  Also, we were often told that DP, the acronym for Displaced Persons, was just another way of describing us as Damn Poles, Dirty Poles, Drunk Poles, and Dumb Poles.  After spending years in slave labor camps and refugee camps, we were seen as stupid and lazy people who had come to America as refugees just to get a free ride funded by American taxpayers.  Poles again were seen as untermensch, subhumans, nothing but mules.

What amazes me is that 70 years later here in America, I hear the same thing, not necessarily about Poles, but about other people who don’t fit the description of what an American should be like.  When I went to college in the late 1950s, I took a history course on the Constitution, and one of the things it taught me was that people are equal.  The 14th Amendment states that "...nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws."  To me, this meant that all of us here in America were not untermensch, not subhumans.  We were all equally American.

I wish all Americans believed this.

Just a few days ago, I was reading about a lecture organized by the Maryland Federation of College Republicans that was given at Salisbury University, a state university in Maryland.  Jared Taylor—a self-described "white advocate" who is widely characterized by civil rights groups as a white supremacist—spoke on that campus on April 29, 2026. Arguing against cultural diversity, Taylor said that it is a form of weakness that creates national instability.  He also argued for racial segregation.  Whites should live apart from people of different cultures and races in order to preserve their own identities. Finally, he argued against immigration, saying it brings in people of different nationalities, cultures, races, and religions, and these differences will destroy America.  

Reading about Jared Taylor’s lecture, I thought about my parents and the Polish DPs I grew up with in Chicago.  So much of what he said brought back memories of how Poles were treated as untermensch by Nazi Germany and how we were treated by some Americans as Dumb Polacks when we came over from the refugee camps after the war.  

And I thought about something else.  I thought about the redistricting and gerrymandering that has gone on or is currently going on in 18 states prior to the midterm elections.  Most of the gerrymandering is by Republicans, and their intention seems pretty clear.  They want an America like the America “white advocate” Jared Taylor wants:  An America without diversity, an America of segregation, an America where immigrants are kept from our shores. 

They want an America that is not America.

—

My column first appeared in the Dziennik Zwiazkowy, the oldest Polish newspaper in America.

Christmas In the Concentration and Slave Camps

 CHRISTMAS IN THE CAMPS

I wanted to write something about Christmas for the Dziennik Zwiazkowy this year that I hadn’t written before.  I’ve been writing columns for the paper for 7 years now, and a number of these columns have been about Christmas.  I’ve written, for example, about our first Christmas in Chicago after we came from the DP camps in Germany, and I’ve written about what it was like buying Christmas trees with my parents in the neighborhoods around Humboldt Park when I was a kid, and I’ve written about what Christmas celebrations were like in our family in the 1950s.

Thumbing through those old columns, it suddenly occurred to me that there is one thing I had never written about.  

I had never written about what Christmas was like for my parents in the German camps during World War II.  My parents often spoke to my sister Donna and me about what Christmas was like when they were children living with their parents in Poland, but my parents never told us anything about what their Christmases were like when they were prisoners in the German concentration and slave labor camps.

When I first realized this, it surprised me because my parents weren’t silent about their experiences in the camps.  My father couldn’t stop talking about the terrible things that happened to him during his almost 5 years in Buchenwald.  He told me about friends who were starved, beaten to death, castrated, and crucified by the German guards.  He told me about seeing women having their breasts cut off by German soldiers.  Although mother was less open about her experiences, she shared stories about seeing women raped and babies murdered in the slave labor camps.    

My mom and dad told me these terrible stories, so why didn’t they tell me about what Christmas was like in the camps?

The answer is pretty obvious, and I felt it as soon as I asked myself the question.

Researching this question, I found that Christmases in the camps – not surprisingly – were hell doubled down over and over.  

The German guards seldom allowed for any kind of celebration of Christmas by the prisoners.  Mostly, the guards wanted the prisoners and slave laborers to do what they did every day, work in the freezing cold until they could not work anymore.  There are also stories of the guards doing perverse and disturbing things to the prisoners during the Christmas season.  In one photograph from Buchenwald, a pile of bodies appears near a series of Christmas wreaths.  In another camp, prisoners were ordered to carry soil, and those who did not carry enough were shot.  Some of those who were shot were piled under a Christmas tree.  In another camp, prisoners were called out into the freezing cold to sing Christmas carols, and they sang there until they froze to death.

Despite this violent abuse by the guards, some prisoners in the camps struggled to make the day feel like Christmas.  They exchanged small gifts, things like pieces of bread or Christmas greetings that they printed on pieces of paper they found in the dirt.  Other prisoners gathered together in the barracks late on Christmas Eve to sing a hushed Christmas carol or share some cherished Christmas memories or say a silent prayer.  The lucky prisoners and slave laborers did this without the guards finding out.  The unlucky ones were beaten or killed.  

Reading through these accounts of what Christmas was like in the slave labor and concentration camps, I immediately came to understand why my parents never shared such memories with my sister Donna and me.  My parents were protecting us from the world they experienced and survived.  They didn’t want us to live with the grief and suffering and pain they knew so well and would never be able to shake free from. 

My parents’ silence was the best Christmas present they could give us.

— 

My latest column for the Dziennik Zwiazkowy, the oldest Polish paper in America.

My Dad was an Alcoholic

My dad didn’t drink during World War II.  He was a Polish slave laborer in Buchenwald Concentration Camp for four years, and in the camps there wasn’t much drinking or even eating.  Right after the camps were liberated, however, he searched for something to drink and found it.  Later in the refugee camps that he and my mom spent six years in, he ran a still and made booze as soon as he could set one up.

He drank for the next 30 years.  He didn’t drink on weekdays.  Weekdays were for working and making the money that the family needed to live in America.  He was absolutely sober those days.  He wouldn’t touch a drop.  

Weekends, however, were different. When I was a kid, I didn’t understand why he drank, but now I do.  My dad drank because he was trying to push back the memory of all the terrible things he had seen in the war.  He hoped that the drinking would cut him off from his memories and from the outside world.  He wanted to isolate himself in that piece of himself that hadn't seen men castrated, women bayoneted in the breast, babies thrown in the air and shot.  He never found that peaceful place.  

So he drank.  Fridays when he came home from the factory where he worked, he would go to the kitchen and take out a bottle of vodka and fill a glass and sit down at the table and drink.  If anyone was in the kitchen with him, he would smile at them and say “to your health.”  He would finish that glass and then take another and another.  He would drink until he passed out.  Saturday, he would begin with beer in the morning and switch to vodka in the afternoon.  Sundays, after church, he’d go to the bar on the corner for his Sunday drink, a free glass of booze that would lead to another and another.  

The peace that he sought never came.  No matter how much he drank, the memories of the war still haunted him.  Sometimes, when he would pass out from the drinking, we could hear him in his sleep weeping or screaming from those memories.  

When he was 56 he realized that the drinking wasn’t helping him, and he sought out a psychiatrist.  He gave him Librium, a medication that’s supposed to relieve anxiety.  It didn't help my dad.  He went back to drinking, and the drinking got so bad that the psychiatrist talked about the possibility that my dad would have to be committed to an asylum of some kind.  

What finally saved him from drinking was my mom telling him she would leave him if he continued to drink.  He couldn't stand that thought.  Her leaving would have been his end, his suicide.  

She was his church

The Day I was Born in a Refugee Camp

The Day I Was Born in a Refugee Camp after the War

My mother washed her face in cold water, tied her hair back, and put on an old dress. 

She said she knew my birth would be hard, that she had given birth before, to my sister, and that then the dirt had flushed out of her body like a rabid dog that had finally snapped its chain. She said as well that there had been storms the day before I was born and that the creeks near the refugee camp were running high and that some of the barracks near the river were evacuated.

Except for the nurse, my mother was alone that day I was born. My father had seen my sister Danusha being born two years earlier, and he wept and said to my mother that he couldn’t go through that again. So she told him he should just leave, take the money they had and go buy himself some vodka, find a barn he could crawl up into and drown himself in the drink, until he couldn’t hear her screams or see the mess that was coming.

It didn’t matter that she was alone.  No one could really help her with the darkness and the screaming when I started to come. There was just me and the tearing in her stomach and her bones breaking apart like life had decided to squeeze her until she was nothing but blood exploding through her useless skin.

And feeling it, feeling that river of shit and the squeezing and the bones breaking, my mother remembered the road that brought her there to that Displaced Persons camp in Germany and that darkness.

She remembered the Germans who killed her mother and raped her sister and kicked her sister’s baby to death, and the years in the slave labor camp when the guards would promise her a potato if she would suck them, or a piece of meat if she would fuck them, and she remembered being thankful for the food.

She remembered too the time right after the war when the other women in the refugee camp struggled to hold on to their babies because they knew that giving birth to them would kill them because their wombs were still in the war, still weak and tortured and beaten, still kicked and stabbed and wounded, still bleeding and crying and hoping, still falling and slipping and starving, still kneeling and begging and weeping, still everything that had happened since the day the Germans put her and the girls from her village on the train to bring them to this Germany where every birth was a struggle in the mud for a breath.

And she screamed then and knew that screaming was useless, and so she screamed again and kept screaming until the flood came and my bones poured from her flesh like tomatoes exploding in the hands of a God who didn’t care about what she remembered or feared or wept over.

She knew that all God wanted was to hold another life in His hand, and that nothing she could beg for could change the way He turned the baby, regarded it, and let it live or not.

—

From Echoes of Tattered Tongues, a book about parents and the war.  Available on Amazon.

A Veteran’s Day Prose Poem

Only the  Dead

 

At first, the men of the burial battalion had tried to bury the dead.  

They dug big trenches and deep ditches, and threw the bodies in, and covered them with lime.  

Then, the chaplain came and prayed over them, and told the dead they would always be remembered and that when the war was over their bodies would be dug up again and taken back home and re-buried where their mothers and fathers and sweethearts could pray and cry and tremble over them, and where Jesus would find them when he came on his golden chariot at the end of time. 

But then the whistling bombs and shrapnel started falling and the bodies and graves became unstuck, and the explosives churned them up like mashed potatoes, churned them into a brown and gray muck of decaying bodies and mud.  

And now the ground was frozen, and the burial battalion was gone, and the chaplain was dead or busy somewhere else praying over the dying who would soon be lying like the others on the frozen ground waiting for the snow to blow over them.

— 

From my novel Retreat — a love story.

Talking to My Mother

 Talking to My Mother

I remember one of the last conversations my mom and I had about the war. I had come to visit her in Arizona where she and I made retired.  

She was 83 years old and dying of all the things she was dying from, and we were sitting in her living room in the evening, and she was telling me about the war, her life in the slave labor camps. 

This time, she was telling me about what it was like just before liberation. 

She was telling me what the German soldiers were doing to the girls in the camps. One terrible thing after another. 

And I looked up from the notes I was taking and saw that she was about to tell me something so terrible that it would just about be the worst thing I’ve ever heard, the last flash and stroke of lightning, and I said, “Mom, I don’t want to hear it.” 

And she said, “I’m going to tell you. You want to know what it was like, and I’m going to tell you.” 

And I said, “Please don’t tell me.” 

And she said, “I’m going to tell you,” and I said, “If you do, I’ll leave and not come back. I’ll stand up and leave and you won’t see me again.” 

And she said, “Okay, you’re 58 years old and still a baby, so I won’t tell you.”

DON’T PICK YOUR NOSE!

“DON’T PICK YOUR NOSE!”

When I was a kid, I heard this all the time.  I heard it from my parents and the nuns and my friends.  I heard it in Polish and English, and I even heard it in Spanish from some neighbors.  

If you’ve ever picked your nose – and I’m sure you have – you’ll know it’s good advice because picking your nose will probably lead you down a dark, bloody street. That red stuff will come gushing out of your nose and down your chin and onto your shirt and your pants and the rug you’re standing on.  It will be one heck of a mess.

Why am I telling you this?  

It’s not because I’ve been picking my nose, but it is because I’ve recently had the worst nose bleed of my life.

Last Thursday night, I was talking to my wife Linda about our weekend plans.  She was suggesting we go to an art museum when my nose suddenly started bleeding.  I’m 76 years old, and I’ve had nose bleeds before.  I take a medicine called Eliquis for a vein problem I have.  One of its negative side effects is that I’m more susceptible to bleeding.  However, that didn’t bother me.   I knew what to do when the blood started coming.  I pinched my nose just below its bridge, and I held that pinch for 20 minutes.  Usually, this works.  It didn’t this time.    

No matter how hard I pinched my nose, the bleeding wouldn’t stop.  It didn’t stop after an hour, and it didn’t stop after 5 hours.   It kept dripping into the sink in fat, dark drops.

Linda said we had to go to the Emergency Room, and I knew she was right. I was losing too much blood.  We hopped into the car, and Linda drove to the hospital.  

All the while, I continued pinching my nose and worrying.  I’ve been to ERs before, and I knew what they were like.  The last time I was in an ER I was there because I had arthritis pain so bad that I couldn’t stand straight or move my arms without pain.  That time, I spent 8 hours waiting to see a doctor, and when I saw one, he advised me to see my regular doctor.

I was afraid this visit was going to be the same.

It wasn’t.

When I entered the emergency room, it was packed with people, but when I told the receptionist my nose had been bleeding for 5 hours, a doctor saw me almost immediately.  He said he had to put a nasal pack in my nose to stop the bleeding.  This pack was a tiny balloon covered by gauze.  He inserted it up my nose and inflated the balloon to exert pressure on the nasal blood vessels to stop them from bleeding.  

It worked!

For about 12 hours.  

Friday, I was in an urgent care seeing another doctor because somehow the balloon exerting pressure had gotten deflated and my nose was bleeding again.  He re-inflated the balloon. 

It worked!

For about 16 hours.

Saturday, I was back in the urgent care seeing the same doctor.  He determined the nasal pack was all screwed up, and he said he had to pull it out.

I said, “Please do!” My nose hadn’t been bleeding, but I’ve had pain from the moment I left the urgent care that first day.  The pressure of that nasal pack caused incredible pain in my nose, eyes, and head.  I felt like my body was swamped by migraines.  I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t rest, I couldn’t sleep. 

Taking the nasal pack out did the trick.  I spent the next day and a half sleeping, recovering from that pain.

Today, I saw another doctor for a follow-up visit.  

He was happy to hear I hadn’t bled for a couple of days and that I wasn’t experiencing any pain.

Smiling, I said, “I’m happy about that too.”

Smiling back, he said, “Let me give you one piece of advice.  Don’t pick your nose!” 

——

My latest column for the Dziennik Zwiazkowy.